Monday, December 31, 2007
It's 9 a.m. tsk tsk very very far from the norm of the hours that I'm up and moving; thanks for vacations such as these-- soul saving. While I'm writing, we have the Rent songs playing over and over-- particularly, Seasons of Love. I love love the lyrics of the song. Now to the inevitable, despite all the bleakness the year 2007 has successfully dispersed down to the final days, there is the challenge to keep swimming and keep our heads up. No, humanity isn't drowning. And there are ways. There are ways that we can still make little pockets of heaven. I guess we owe it to ourselves-- that much of an effort to not just let things go. Yes, there are things that worry me, it seems with all the environmental, socio-political, and economic woes our generation is facing. . . there really isn't much left save for the heightened intellectual awareness and the assertion for expression and creativity that we are left with. There is also a return to the Eastern wisdom---- perhaps, it's about just that time! To that, I give a toast to life.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
More than an excuse that I am back from a hiatus, I'd rather like to say that I am back from an interruption. So yes, obviously, I'm back from a six month absence. Again, because I'm finally on Christmas break and yes, I'd like to make this break count. Reemerge, reemerge, reemerge. So here are my thoughts: For the past six months or so it has come to my understanding that there is indeed no excuse for us human beings to be out of the line of responsibility for our own welfare and for the whole world, at least for our own immediate surroundings. AT this point I'm just thinking about the trash I put out-- did I segregate it good enough? I'm not writing to be coherent here. The good thing about blogging is that regardless of the fact that nobody reads your blogs because there are millions of other blogs that people would rather spend their time on--I am challenged to write more and write more, at a standard that is more demanding than a written journal-- and yet, knowing that I must account for honesty in what I write. Who reads this anyway? So there. Going back to the topic on responsibility-- I am trying to fully inculcate the understanding that I have to live my best life possible-- given the understandings that have come across my way. Recently, I have been guided by some motivation from again, The Secret, a morning session with Eve (of Eve's garden), Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth", a show on the BBC, The Happiness Formula, Benazir Bhutto's assassination, my profession, my studies, and a continued endeavor to work on my spirituality. It's true. I'm not afraid to talk about this. It's about time. And though, on the onset, not much of these manifest in a more productive, concrete way, I'm working on it. . . And yes, I know it's all a matter of personal conviction really. Ugh, okay okay, I'm going to say it!!!!!!!!!!!! Utter frustration! Is it because I've allowed myself to be too complacent with other irrelevant things that I have allowed to accomplish little. Yet, it's a personal judgment. Maybe I'm too harsh (work on the positive, work on the positive). At this point now I'm thinking, am I too self-absorbed? Well, immediately, here's the premise I'm working on: WHEN WE CHANGE, THE WORLD CHANGES. And yes, I'm pretty sure about this. In fact, I've been posting vigil on the BBC channel and bbc.com, and oh my goodness, there is so much to learn, so much to be, and so much to do. I hope it's not too late-- with all the roles and responsibilities, I must make a way to do whatever it is I need to do. There are reasons why I've lost touch for six months. I know the reasons. And those reasons won't ever interfere again. We are well informed. There is no excuse anymore, and that is scary.
Friday, June 15, 2007
essie Tomas, Boy Abunda, Ricky Davao and Timmy Cruz are the celebrity hosts of “Time and Transformation,” a unique entertainment/ experiential program set at the Araneta Coliseum in Cubao, Quezon City, on Monday, June 18. Gates open at 6 p.m. and show time is at 7 p.m. Through song, dance and snappy video exchanges among prominent personalities of values-based vignettes, “Time and Transformation” will illustrate that changing for the better is as easy—often even enjoyable—as it is urgent. Floy Quintos directs the groundbreaking musical presentation, which will feature dance guru Douglas Nierras, with guests Joey Ayala and Grace Nono. The Charity First Mime Artists and Apostolic Catholic Church Choir will present special numbers. A very distinguished guest is Hirdaya Mohini, one of three administrative heads of the Brahma Kumaris, the international organization mounting the event to celebrate 70 years of global service (25 in the Philippines). Known around the world as Dadi Gulzar (“Bouquet of Flowers,” although her real name means “The One Who Attracts People’s Hearts”), the well-loved international lecturer and spiritual leader is expected to address a 10,000 capacity crowd at the Big Dome. “Time and Transformation” is a free concert and everyone is invited. For inquiries, please call tel. nos. 890-7960 (Rose Uy) and/or 922-9231 (Vicky Mandap.) Or visit www.bk-tnt.blogspot.com
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
So last night I was happily done with "Fat, Cranky and Full of It" by Sonni Viudez-- okay, I'm a tad bit woozy right now-- verge of sleeping-- but it was really really good. If more guys read it, they'd actually know how women are the greatest mystery ever and the sexes would live happily ever after for some moments-- at least! Anyway, the next one I'm reading is "Little Freedoms" by Maryanne Moll. I'm on the fifth page.
After waking up at around 12 mn, I couldn't get to go to sleep anymore. By one-ish, I was back in the Internet-- great cure for emerging insomniacs like myself (I hope not!!!). All I did was look at the listings of all international schools registered in EARCOS-- okay okay, I was just browsing! I wanted to see what the vacant teaching jobs were. So I did a little experiment-- the results and full account of which I will divulge in due time. I was done with the internet at around 5:30 a.m. and I was wavering on the idea whether or not I should go to my little part time job while I'm on vacation from work (my real work starts in August-- I have a two month break as part of being our "summer vacation" which really isn't summer anymore, sigh). So there. I still decided to go-- report at 8:30 and finished at around 10"45-- went straight to UP and by good graces got so so so much cooperation from Manang Violy. The angel of UP. I'll post her picture soon. Haggard, haggard, haggard-- wearing tsinelas, skinny jeans, and a frumpy shirt-- I was gasp!! gasp!!! mistaken to be a freshman at the table where they released enrollment forms!!!! super duper gasp!!! Maybe it's the 3 zits on my forehead-- that should have been way over 15 years ago. To my delight, I actually told them: "mag-add kayo ng 16 years sa edad na 'yon" (Add 16 years to my presupposed age). Hehehe! Anyway, what can I say???!!! So I actually veered off from this really really really long line-- payment of fees. So I just went to the UP bookstore. At this point I'm thinking: "Why I didn't take pictures at that time is beyond me." Argh! Sayang. Anyway, I'm taking pics tomorrow. I passed by the UP Press Bookstore-- ah, sanctuary-- an escape from today's enrollment hype. I'm thanking the Supreme Being up there that I've finally made peace with a professor today. Let's just finish with point that I didn't do anything in the first place, it's just that years ago, I was mistakenly blamed for doing something I did not do. Ah, bliss--- bliss, bliss. Today was extremely good.
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
Even at this time that I'm trying to whip up a thesis proposal and going through my stash of newly acquired NBS books, can I just say this. . . I LOVE BAGUIO!!! hehehehe! Now, I was going to go to SB (this gourmet coffee place) but heck ever since I could remember, I always want to get my money's worth. . . Here's what I need, ambiance, comfy couch, overflowing coffee. Why, while I was driving to John Hay, Forest House was just in the most convenient way!!!!!!!!!! Oh yeah! Perfect. I got to finish almost one whole book by this guy, Sonni M. Viudez, "Fat Cranky and Full of It: Funny Essays with Delusions of Grandeur"-- I'm trying to see his active construct of Filipino Femininity-- If you want to understand the whole mars and venus thing-- read this. I'm very very surprised that this writer is a guy. Anyway, the three consecutive pictures of coffee is not the same coffee. each picture says how often i had coffee.
This is the side that I incessantly look at for inspiration.
My stash of books to read and mashed potatoes with gravy
I'm old fashioned. I don't want to bring my laptop. . . I went to the restroom thrice!!! Does that mean I have to bring my laptop too just in case to the restroom as well??? Just in case it tempts theivery . . .??? OMGosh! I need some peace of mind. So, yes, paper and pen is the way to go!!!I actually had a third serving, but I'm not going to post that anymore. Funny, one of the waiters tried to strike a conversation. Funny, he was asking if I was taking up NURSING. . . NURSING????? huh??? Anyway, the conclusion is: I'VE FOUND MY SANCTUARY!!!!!!!!!!! YAHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS THE PLACE WHERE I'M GOING TO WORK AND WORK AND WORK AND WORK AND WORK. BY THE WAY, I SPENT SATURDAY NIGHT AT FOREST HOUSE. ACOUSTIC SINGING IS PERFECT. FOR A CONSUMABLE DEAL OF 150, I honestly feel I got more of a really good deal since the band-- DejaVu is absolutely excellent (I'm so tempted to record their songs and put it on a CD-- I so love the way they sing. . . Nice sounds for a good drive!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Since I've been off from official school work, there's nothing like being able to actually write on almost a daily basis (whether people read it or not, this really is for me anyway). ehehehe!!!! So here it is, just because of the sheer joy that I'm finally able to stroll along this endeared promenade (supposed to be) area, here is how Session Road looked at 11 a.m.
Monday, June 4, 2007
Now here's the highlight of this particular market trip: Two words: Sweet Corn-- yum yum yum! I'm boiling one for myself now this very minute!
OOOhhhhhkay, here's a picture that has bangus, I thinkIn conclusion, I'm am prone to feeding myself lots and lots this 2 month break! Yahoo! cheers to a life in BAguio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is the ultimate place to buy everything made by soy beans: warm taho, warm soybean milk, tofu, tokwa, soft tofu-- aaahhh! Vegetarian paradise!!!!!!!!!!!
I love love this-- specially in Mongolian eat all you can at O Mai Khan. I'm cooking Tom Yum so I'm getting a couple of these
Due to my inability to move and shift things in the correct chronological way, you will have to eat from down to up. Forgive me!!!!!!! Dig dig dig this. Donuts that look like something out of Mister or Dunkin donuts for only 3 bucks. Unfortunately, I've never been a donut fan so I didn't try to do a taste test. Anyway, it was really really amusing!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There's actually steam that comes out of this bag of fresh fresh native corn. Um um um!!!!!!!!!! Not to mention warm and I mean warm Taho!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! These come in ten peso to twenty peso deals!!!!!!!!! These come in 10-30 pesos . . . utterably fashionable. Style exudes from the wearer and not just the merchandise. You beg to disagree? I don't care!
Okay. So I don't know if it's me or my good luck but I can only load up once successfully. So that means I will have part 3 and 4, or even till 5. To post all the relevant pictures. Before I even got the market, I couldn't help myself but heed to the call of "National Bookstore". I was having an inner debate on whether or not I'm going to blow my moola on all and I mean all of Jessica Zafra's book for my thesis: The Constuction of Filipino femininity in Jessica Zafra's books but something within me told me that I needed to seek other options: Filipino women writers from the bookshelf-- equalling contemporary non-fiction writers and the construction of current Filipino femininity. Okay, so I went to National Bookstore since it was on the way naman to the market di ba? Years and years ago, National bookstore and actually being in there was already heaven for me. A trip to Manila wasn't complete till I step inside National Bookstore. I want to own one!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH! Seemingly "thin" books but hefty in words eh? Okay, NOW I'm on my way to market. Daily scene. Oh by the way, I did not use my camera. I wanted to take pictures in stealth--- actually added more pumpin' adventure to it. Oh see part three.
Saturday, June 2, 2007
You've gotta cut me some slack. I took the advantage to go to HBC. I confess, I'm not into going to the parlor on a regular basis. When I go for some occasional haircut I get this incessant question of : So, who does your hair??? I detest that question. I just say, "Oh anyone." Have a shamed myself to shreds. Have I implied a non-sophisticated frumpy level for myself? You know what, I don't care. Oh anyway, back to HBC, on rare occasion that I get to go to HBC, my stash includes buying the biggest sizes of Apple shampoo and conditioner plus the biggest jar of hot oil. So there. Part of my marketing, okay!? Thou shall market for self first. hehehehe! Hey! I've worked hard to the bone this school year!
WHy is this here????!!!! I was waiting for parking near Abanao Square. I circled twice and I was looking at the clock and still reconciling with the fact that at 840 a.m., the parking is full. I had more pictures to this. Not just this one. I've been trying to load up pictures through blogger but I've been getting really bad rejections. . . ARgh! I'm experimenting on opening up a new post so I can post more pictures. It takes too long to put up pictures through blogger. Am I doing something wrong???!!!! The good thing is that I'm able to read the stash of books I bought yesterday. I'm on a reading marathon so that I can write up some meat for my thesis proposal. I'm sounding so selfish. Yes today is all about me. selfish selfish selfish. tsk tsk tsk
Friday, June 1, 2007
Do or Die!!! It's Friday and I have my thesis proposal to finish by the end of this day. I need an energizer. Mediation thought: Thank you thank you thank you for all these auspicious opportunities. Now, being true to this life in Baguio, I'm taking some pictures of the Baguio Market. Now, because I'm vegetarian, I might be biased okay? Off I go! I'll be back!
Thursday, May 31, 2007
I may not be able to be as mobile and as hawk-eyed as others in as far as the stuff that goes around here but from my work place, I relish the opportunity to marvel at the art work the students have done. Apart from actually coming up with a really simple book with the help of some students and staff-- not to mention, my co-teacher Cynthia, the environment of Baguio is soooo conducive for such growth for it is fecund ground. These are the students doing poetry reading from a fifteen minute exercise we had. I just have one for this: Phenomenal Another product of genius is the annual IB Art Exhibit. My my, these guys can really really paint!!!!!!!!!!!!! These students are sooooo lucky: by Gia Mendoza, Grade 12
Call it a nightmare come true but for days on end, I could not write a word. . . maybe work has gotten this "high" hands over my head. . . and I was to caught up reading other people's blogs that I did not even have enough oomph to even check my site. Hahaha! I actually have been reading Bryanboy. Well, school is over and I'm giving myself this nth chance of writing over and over and over again. I know I'm supposed to be talking about Baguio but I'm so caught up in thinking about what kind of thesis proposal I'm going to show my professor next week. It's driving me crazy. . . !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so, anyway, apart from writing letters and writing on this blog-- I'm aiming to finish something: perhaps on the construction of filipino femininity by filipino women authors-- Jessica Zafra???!!!. Oh dear. Soon, I'll be taking a walk and will be taking some pictures and then hopefully, I can write about dear beloved Baguio. Ask me about the turn out of the elections???? Yes, I did vote and until now the indelible ink (part of it-- has left a nasty but very small now--"scar". A proud scar. I'll write again. It's been raining and that crisp smell is there. . . yes, it's nice to take a walk
Sunday, April 15, 2007
I'm back from Manila!!! And I've finally kissed the ground and paid homage to my mother-ship: UP Diliman. I've honestly been reading from other blogs as often as I 've been reading the newspaper-- Inquirer--which is everyday-- like second skin, like brushing one's teeth. As a beginning blogger, I specifically looked into the blog of my old-time friend jester-in-exile. That's how I actually got into reading so much about the blog parteeh and the blog awards. More of like an epiphanic effect, I really got hitched into this blogging itch (hehe, can't help but be corny with rhymes). Until Thursday afternoon, I was still actually coming to terms with really acknowledging that I'm really going to IBlog3! I am on an "infowhelm" at the moment. This term, coined by ian jukes of the committed sardine blog (check this site out!) and so all I could do is just really post some pictures and my post-iBlog3 musings will come in later. I do have so much of a line up, but this will have to do first-- besides, from the notes I've taken down, I am challenging myself to blog at least every other day. Walking into the UP School of Economics Auditorium -- This is what greeted me. Here's Atty. JJ Disini giving his Welcome Remarks. Followed by speakers Chris Havarata on "Blogging for Newbies", Followed by Noemi Dado (Personal Blogging Success Story), and her daughter Lauren on Do's and Don'ts to personal blogging. This is just the first batch of stuff I'd like to share. Meanwhile, I dread the thought that tomorrow is a Monday, but I'm am ever ever thankful for the pile of papers I have to check-- So, see ya! 'Nuffabloggin fer now'
Monday, April 2, 2007
. .“Thank your grandmothers and mothers who have lived and paved the way for you ladies to have a better life out there.” That’s something I said to a class some months ago. Y’know, the fun part about teaching is that sometimes you get engaged in this impromptu soliloquy where instant insights lead to sudden outbursts of authentic talk–”me” talking. I’ve recently turned thirty. While age really has not become an issue for me in terms of being more and more aware of the expected wiles of physically maturing, read: hormonal imbalance, living with the fact that at 30, your skin starts aging, etc, I’ve become more highly aware of the question: Do I count? Have I made my life count?I live for stimulating conversation because of the way I probably was brought up. The women in my family have all set a precedent for the women in my generation– from the daughters to now, us, the grand daughters. At this point, I’m short of saying that yes, I came from a matriarchal family. Therefore, when I got educated in UP: as to the fact that women have always been placed in the disadvantaged binary opposite of man, it was then only dawned upon me that the social world I actually live in is not in my favor. At this point, when I learned about this, confirmed it in my life, saying, “Yes, yes, that is all true . . . Ah, no wonder. . . — Ironically, I was already married. See, that’s what I get for not pushing through with a UP undergrad education — and later just to go to UP for grad school. Yes, I’ve studied feminism and most, if not all, the isms in school– but if you ask me if I’m a feminist– I would say that even before feminism was brought to my consciousness, I already had built-in chips on empowered womanhood. I was raised in a family where women took on a strong voice at home. And so, absolutely clueless I was to the expected subservient behavior of women. My mother worked, she employed maids; she drove; she went to the parlor; she got herself into the habit of continuing education; and she managed all these by being the woman of the house. And so my dad, who also worked; also drove. Why am I stressing on the driving thing? here’s why: Sometimes, when I’m behind the wheel of my car and I get to pass by the streets with children– boys and girls alike, going home from school, I get to hear them say, “Tignan mo oh, babae nag-dra-drive?” I feel good. I say, “good, I count”. Seeing a woman drive extends the synapses of a girl’s brain into at least even hoping that it is possible. . . dreaming that it’s possible. My mother and her sisters total to 7. (They had one brother who unfortunately was murdered). All of them have lived the life preceded by my grandmother who lived as strong headed as both her husbands (taken one at a time mind you– Lola was widowed twice). I’ve one time felt trapped as soon as I’ve gotten married. Suddenly the patriarchal expectations of a wife set me in a depressing mood: Before I got married, I was confident with how I looked, how I was as a person– specially, my inner me. I thought I was ready for the world and that I can take on whatever it was to be a “wife”– not that I even really thought profusely about it. Oh well, but yes, I didn’t know– I was totally naive about the fears set at bay–standards of beauty: One had to have big boobs, the super bod, the obedient puppy, a woman who knows her place— in the kitchen, in the room, even in the toilet. Woman must stay at home kind of thing. . . I wasn’t made for that. I always seemed odd when at parties, all the men would bunch up together and all the women would bunch up together— it seemed odd to me, and I was odd to them. Why couldn’t it be mixed? I found myself level-headed and apt to speak out in any conversation regardless of being aware of my gender. Well, thank goodness, I truly truly truly thank my lucky stars: My mother in law is as empowered and as head strong as the women in my family are. As soon as I’ve realized that, I had a special bond with my mother in law. It’s not that we ganged up on the men in the family including my husband, but she was even one of the first ones from the side of my in-laws to support my resuming to work after I have given birth. I knew what it was like to be a homemaker and at this point, I totally put in high reverence women who have opted, women who have been ordered, women who had no other choice but to bear the equal boon and bane of staying at home– because I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. Besides, realistically, our household needed the support of two incomes. When I found out in the ultrasound that the baby I was carrying was a girl, my first silent-kept-to-myself reaction was– Oh no! Would she survive? Grow up to be a stronger, wiser woman than myself? Will she get hurt? Will she be happy? And while Kahlil Gibran says such, please look to the bold-marked words,: Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you. You may give them your love but not your thoughts. For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday. You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth. The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far. Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable. I do believe, to this very day, that women and men set ripples, set precedents, of whatever sky we set our children to as we cast and string our “arrows”– what sky is it? what hands have set the arrows in motion? WE WERE ALL ONCE ARROWS TOO. You may ask how my husband is? I am sure he is fine. He gets to have his Yamaha R1– he’s living his passions while I on the other hand am likewise living my passions: studying, writing, traveling– it is a daily reconciliation of what marriage and friendship should be. . . despite differences– one learns to choose to be happy.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
. . . nothing exists unless it is written. . . To end, let me quote a most endearing thought by Natalie Goldberg, author of "Writing Down the Bones": "Writers live twice. They go along with their regular life . . . But there's another part of them that they have been training. The one that lives everything a second time." This is my last post for today. . . I do have so much to do-- it's just that I can't help myself from writing all these down. . . must satiate . . . must satiate! Sounds carnivorous but hey, I'm a vegetarian (lacto-vegetarian). Thankfully, truly truly thankfully that I live in Baguio! Speaking of the title that was supposed to have been my focus (forgive the deviation), as a Baguio dweller, one incident on Saturday, February 24 put me to a bit of shame to actually ignore and avoid this festival--- okay, okay, so nothing's perfect but let me explain this: Sans the fact that riding behind my husband on a motorbike just to get to town that morning . Despite the blur of traffic wrought by people and cars, something was lucid before my eyes: People make all the trouble to get here. . . There MUST be something about the Flower Festival now. I guess the power of the critical mass that seems to have spark a thrill for the festival has gotten me. Oh but make no mistake that I've never held the Baguio Flower Festival close to my heart. I actually worked for the John Hay Poro Point Development Corporation specifically under Atty. Bangaoet-- so this was five years of being the working staff of the Flower Festival. To cut it short, all I'm saying is that while I've always seen the festival as work-- this year I paid attention to being a tourist-- what it was like. . . People pushing, people straining, people forgetting their snags in life. . . It was hot, but it was simply great.
. . . nothing exists unless it is written. . . To end, let me quote a most endearing thought by Natalie Goldberg, author of "Writing Down the Bones": "Writers live twice. They go along with their regular life . . . But there's another part of them that they have been training. The one that lives everything a second time." Last February 13, my daughter, Calille (named after Kahlil Gibran), went on her first field trip to Leisure Coast, Dagupan. I took a leave from work; I psyched myself to enjoy the day; I thought it would just be a typical family day. I was dead wrong--- Because I asked myself one question at the end of the day--- what if, just what if, I actually went on more field trips when I was younger--- would I have become a different person? I consider myself fairly brave with facing challenges (like jumping off a rope set high up 30 feet beyond the ground -- high ropes course), upfront with people and tasks (I teach teenagers-- so THAT alone qualifies me) and frank (I'm happily surviving seven years of marriage aint I? And heck, I get to blog!). So, here's something out of the ordinary from my ordinary world-- First, my daughter rode on a bus by herself with her class (8 kids, Nursery class).-- not that that was new; second and more climactic was that my daughter, without hesitation took the slides on and on and on and on and on. Okay, sigh, so I couldn't. I wonder what stopped me. Up to now I'm saying to myself-- I've given birth, I can do anything!!!!!!!!!!!!! Guess I need to repeat this mantra the next time I face a water slide. . . Mental note: Must get to Leisure Coast and face my demons!